The links between Star Wars and The Muppets are varied and plentiful. I like the sound of that! Lets all say it together... "varied and plentiful." I'll have to remember that and use it again. Both Star Wars and The Muppets are popular with kids, who still like both when they reach adulthood. Both use funny-looking creatures. Both employ Frank Oz. Both have a lucrative toy marketing franchise. And then there's Jar Jar Binks, which makes you think of a Muppet, but none of the Muppet people will claim him. They will be glad to claim Chewbacca.

In 1980, Mark Hamill guest starred on The Muppet Show. Therefore, all the other Star Wars characters had to make an appearance. I found a synopsis of this lunacy. More images here.

 

The Muppet Show, Star Wars Episode

You can watch the full episode, part one, part two, and part three.

Then we heard that Frank Oz, muppeteer extraordinaire, second only to Jim Henson on the creative side of the muppets, was going to do a character in the second Star Wars film (episode 5 for you young 'uns) named Yoda.

A song to set the mood: The Star Wars Cantina.

C3PO meets Big Bird.

C3PO meets Kermit.

Gonzo's recurring character Dearth Nadir.

Darth Elmo, also known as Darth Elmo the Treacherous, was a Sith Mega-Super-Overlord known for being more evil than any other being in the Galaxy. He was so evil, in fact, that his attempt to set up his own Galaxy-spanning Sith Empire failed only because he turned on himself, in what later Sith would enviously call "the ultimate act of treachery."

In 1999, the muppets did their own space movie, Muppets from Space.

Which was a natural progression from the earlier skit Pigs in Space.

Lyrics to Y.O.D.A. (to the tune of Y.M.C.A.)

Sesame Street, the Star Wars episode.

R2D2 and C3PO on Sesame Street

The Top 12 Things Uttered by Yoda During Sex

11. "Urm. Put a shield on my saber I must."

10. "Feel the force!"

9. "Foreplay, cuddling - a Jedi craves not these things."

8. "Down here, I am. Find a ladder, I must!"

7. "Do me or do me not - there is no try."

6. "Early must I rise. Leave now you must!"

5. "You know, this would be a lot more fun without Frank
Oz's hand up my ass."

4. "Happens to every guy sometimes this does."

3. "When 900 years old you get, Viagra you need too, hmmmm?"

2. "Ow, ow, OW! On my ear you are!"

1. "Who's your Jedi master? WHO'S your Jedi Master?"

Thought for today: May the farce be with you.

This post first appeared April 6th, 2006.

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Batman has always been more fun than Superman. While Superman is, well, super, he was always too perfect, and rather one-dimensional. Batman is quite human. Through many incarnations of the same basic character, we can see what we want to in him. A fabulously wealthy man with lots of sexy toys in the basement becomes a mysterious crime fighter when needed. He can be the pompous and insufferably smart hero of the 60s TV series, or the brooding and enigmatic Michael Keaton character. Plus the many other types of Batman in the comics over the years. Batman stories have real suspense, because there is always the remote possibility he can get hurt or even killed. And there’s the real likelihood he’ll become angry, spiteful, or even do something he’ll regret later. Like all of us.



The Dark Knight in Lego

Take a look at Why So Serious? The Many Faces of Joker, with images spanning from the comic book to feature the character in 1940 to Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight. Bonus: Here’s an image of the even earlier character who inspired the creation of The Joker.

The Dark Knight trailer, mixed with the 1966 Batman TV series.

The Daily Batman. “A Batman a day keeps the doctor away.”

The Best Batman Joke Ever.

Batman and Robin music you can download.

The Official Burt Ward Website. For you young folks, he played Robin on TV.

The best name for anyone ever.

Batman by Dostoyevsky.

Batman Lecturing Robin. He did a lot of that, if you recall. (via Say No To Crack)

CAMPING OUT

Batman and Robin are camping in the desert, set up their tent and are asleep. Some hours later, Batman wakes his faithful friend. "Robin, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Robin replies, " I see millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?" asks Batman.

Robin ponders for a minute.

"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.

Chronologically, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.

Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.

Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you, Batman?"

Batman is silent for a moment, then speaks:

"Robin, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent."

MARRIAGE

Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decide to amaze their men….that night all three will wear a leather bodice S&M style, stilettos and mask over their eyes .

After a few days they meet again…..

The engaged girlfriend said: “The other night, when my boyfriend came back home, he found me with the leather bodice, 12 cms stilettos and mask. He saw me he said, “You are the woman of my life, I love you…then we made love all night long.”

The mistress stated: “Ah! me too, the other night I met my lover in the office and I was wearing the leather bodice, mega stilettos, mask over my eyes and a raincoat, when I opened the raincoat… he did not say anything…..but we had wild sex all night.”

The married one then said: “The other night I sent the kids to stay at my mothers for the night, I got myself ready, leather bodice, super stilettos and mask over my eyes….my husband comes back from work, opens the door and says: “Hi Batman, what’s for dinner?”

Previously at Miss Cellania: Superhero and Superhero Roundup

Thought for today:  If Clark wanted, he could use his superspeed and squish me into the cement. But I know how he thinks. Even more than the Kryptonite, he's got one big weakness. Deep down, Clark's essentially a good person... and deep down, I'm not. -Batman

humor jokes video funny games Batman superhero Robin The Dark Knight

When I Googled “classic TV”, one of the top articles that came up was about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Sigh. I guess the definition of “classic” varies among generations. So I’m not restricting this post to the Golden Age of Television, although that was the original intent. I’m old enough to remember when there was only one TV in the house and nobody argued about what to watch, because we only had one or two channels to choose from. When you met others at school or work the next day, you could be sure that just about everyone watched the same shows you did. Cartoons were only on for a hour after school and on Saturday mornings. Hearing The Syncopated Clock meant you were suffering from insomnia. If you missed an episode, you just missed it -no alternate feeds, no Tivo, no DVD collections. My kids don’t understand how I managed to grow up without a rewind button.



Twin Peaks in Lego (via Dump Trumpet)

Where are they now: the Cast of M*A*S*H. Hint: they are either dead, painting pictures, or have a new movie coming out.

The Seven Deadly Sins of Gilligan’s Island. I think poor Gilligan was labeled with “what’s left”. (via J-Walk Blog)

Dark Shadows Stick Figure Theatre. Several episodes to choose from.

TVgasm, a blog about television shows. Find your favorite and have a laugh.

The MZTV Museum of Television offers a timeline of television history. (via the Presurfer)

15 TV Sensations Whose Popularity Faded Fast.

Name That TV Theme Song Game. This is way more fun than it should be.

The Five Most Disturbing Public Service Announcements of All Time.

As Seen on TV: The 10 Most Laughably Misleading Ads.

Whatever happened to all those people who played peripheral characters on Seinfeld?

Where are they now? The original 6 American Gladiators.

Cases of Life Imitating the Simpsons. Either Matt Groening is psychic, or we live in a very weird world. And right after that was posted, here comes another example.

There’s too much violins on TV.

Things you would never know without TV.

The Encyclopedia of Television. (via the Presurfer)

The Smartest TV Shows of All Time, as compiled by the chairman of Mensa. Your opinions may vary.

The 100 Best TV Shows of all Time.

Blog of the Day: The Classic TV History Blog.

Interactive TV Test Pattern. Click on the screen to change it up.

What TV Has Become

 NBC
8:00 Friends
8:30 Girlfriends
9:00 One Guy with Several Female Friends
9:30 My Gay Friends
10:00 Friends You Wish You Had But Don't

FOX
8:00 Real Humans in Real Pain
8:30 Feral Dingoes Eating Children on Tape
9:00 Jiggle It Beach
9:30 LA Chicks
10:00 The Simpsons, carrying the entire network

FOX NEWS
8:00 Bill O’Reilly Hates Everyone
8:30 Hannity & Colmes Hates Selected Guests
9:00 Brit Hume Loves George Bush
9:30 Some Selected News Stories
10:00 Sinful Things You Must See

The CW
8:00 The Unwatchables
8:30 Voyage To The Bottom Of The Ratings
9:00 Theoretically Existing Show
9:30 Praying For Syndication
10:00 The Last Thing You'd Ever Want To Sit Through

PUBLIC ACCESS
8:00 Blurry Steve
8:30 Inaudible City Council Meeting
9:00 Do We Have A Caller On The Line? Hello?
9:30 The Best Of Lunch Menus
10:00 My Friend Made This Short Film

HBO
8:00 Police Series with Swearing and Sex
9:00 Western Series with Swearing and Sex
10:00 Prison Series with Swearing and Sex
11:00 A Movie

E!
8:00 Andy Gibb: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills
8:30 John Belushi: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills
9:00 Margot Kidder: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills
9:30 River Phoenix: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills
10:00 Boy George: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills

ESPN2
8:00 Finland's Brutalest Men
8:30 Being Hit By A Trolley Regional Semifinals
9:00 60 Minutes Of Joe Theismann's Leg Breaking
10:00 Coed Spread-Eagled Weight-Training From Maui

LIFETIME
8:00 How Can I Choose Between My Daughters?
9:00 The Abused Wife Who Didn't Mean To Kill Her Fourth Husband in Self-Defense
10:00 The Boy Whose Mommy Watched Far Too Much Television

MTV
8:00 Reality Show with Beautiful Young People
9:00 Beautiful Young People in Some Cool Place
9:30 How to Hook Up with Beautiful Young People
10:00 Ugly Old People who Used to be Pop Stars

TNN (a clue to how old the original version of this joke is)
8:00 Well, I'll Be Dipped in Pigturd!
8:30 Roadkill Recipe to Warm the Cockles of Your Heart
9:00 You Hush Up, Wanda Mae
9:30 Sheeeeeeee-ewt!
10:00 Hold 'Er Down While I Get the Rifle From the Truck

We Interupt this program to bring you a special announcement from the Useless Men: 

Black and White TV

(Under age 40? You won’t understand.) You could hardly see for all the snow, Spread the rabbit ears as far as they go. Pull a chair up to the TV set, “Good Night, David. Good Night, Chet.” Depending on the channel you tuned, You got Andy and Opie - or Ward and June. It felt so good. It felt so right. Life looked better in black and white.

I Love Lucy, The Real McCoy’s, Dennis the Menace, the Cleaver boys, Rawhide, Gunsmoke, Wagon Train, Superman, Jimmy and Lois Lane. Father Knows Best, Patty Duke, Rin Tin Tin and Lassie too, Donna Reed on Thursday night! — Life looked better in black and white.

I wanna go back to black and white. Everything always turned out right. Simple people, simple lives… Good guys always won the fights. Now nothing is the way it seems, In living color on the TV screen. Too many murders, too many fights, I wanna go back to black and white.

In God they trusted, alone in bed, they slept, A promise made was a promise kept. They never cussed or broke their vows.

They’d never make the network now. But if I could, I’d rather be In a TV town in ‘53. It felt so good. It felt so right. Life looked better in black and white.

I’d trade all the channels on the satellite, If I could just turn back the clock tonight To when everybody knew wrong from right. Life was better in black and white!
(PS by Miss C) It was great, but only if you were white.

We now conclude our broadcast day.

Lots more TV sign-offs at Metafilter.

Thought for today: Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we've got television. -Archie Bunker

humor links video funny games television sitcoms series TV

There was a time when the word “magician” was not allowed in this home. See, I dated my husband when I was in high school (he was older). I got a job at a tourist-trap-type-place where entertainers from other states worked during the summer. The breakup with my boyfriend came because of a magician who “enchanted” me. That was history, and I eventually married my high school sweetheart. But he did NOT want to see me palming cards or playing finger games with coins. To this day I can figure out how a magician does a trick, but I also bite my tongue before admitting it.

There are those who claim that magic is like the tide; that it swells and fades over the surface of the earth, collecting in concentrated pools here and there, almost disappearing from other spots, leaving them parched for wonder. There are also those who believe that if you stick your fingers up your nose and blow, it will increase your intelligence. -- The Teachings of Ebenezum, Volume VII

Steve Martin as the Great Flydini.

Daniel Chesterfield, World’s Greatest Magician.

Mimes band together for the Million Mime March (motto: A million silent voices can say a lot). Also see the Adopt A Mime page!

Amazing Ventriloquist Kevin Johnson (via Arbroath) Here’s another routine.

Tom Riddler’s Magic Diary. Type in your question and get an immediate (and eerie) answer!

This magician is for the birds.

Everyone loves Magical Trevor!

Read your own Tarot with The Housewives Tarot. Also includes recipes! (Thanks, Bill!)

The World’s Most Dangerous Comic.

Magic Card Trick!

Magic Card Trick for idiots.

Magic Card Trick for complete idiots.

How to levitate a screw.

Is it a magic show or a strip tease? Both! Ursula Martinez obviously has nothing up her sleeve. NSFW.

THE MAGICIAN

A magician was on stage doing his act, when he called for a volunteer from the audience. A man volunteered & went up on stage. The magician told him to pick up the 16 lb. sledgehammer that was on stage next to a cement block & break the block apart with the sledgehammer, so the audience would know the sledgehammer was real.

So, the man swung the sledgehammer with all his might & shattered the cement block. The magician now told the man to hit him square in the face with the sledgehammer. Horrified, the man said, "No way. It'll probably kill you".

The magician insisted that the man hit him in the face, saying, "I'll be fine...I promise you...go ahead."

"Well,", the man replied, "OK here goes."

Again, the man swung the sledgehammer and aimed it at the magicians face.  The result was very bloody. The magicians nose was crushed, teeth fell out, blood everywhere. After 6 months in a coma in the hospital, the magician was lying in the hospital bed. One eye opened, the fingers flexed a bit, the other eye opened, and the magician sat straight up and said, "Ta-da!"

Criss Angel scares some folks in the park.

THE CRUISE SHIP

After much competition,a very talented  magician had just obtained a job performing on a luxury cruise ship. Each night his pet parrot interrupted and spoiled his  performance by saying "It's up his sleeve", "It's in his pocket" "It's in his shoe", etc, etc.

One night while performing the act, the ship's boiler blew up and the ship sank. The fortunate magician was able to grab onto one of the ship's planks, and along with his parrot, floated on the sea. The first few days that the wood drifted, the parrot just stared at the magician looking puzzled. On the 4th day the bewildered parrot looked at his master and said "I give up, what did you do with the ship?"

THE JUGGLER

(lifted from Wulfweard)
A juggler, driving to his next performance, was stopped by the police.

"What are those knives doing in your car?" asked the officer.

"I juggle them in my act," answers the man.

"Oh yeah?" says the cop. "Let's see you do it." So the juggler starts tossing and juggling the knives.

A guy driving by sees this and says, "Wow, am I glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they're making you do now!"

 
Previously on Miss Cellania: Illusions

 
Thought for today: More persons, on the whole, are humbugged by believing in nothing, than by believing too much.  -P.T. Barnum

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