Star Trek: Shorties
Wednesday, 12.09.09 @ 12:02PM
Mr. Spock was experimenting with cloning alien species. His first experiment was a disaster; the result was ugly and obscene. He decided to get rid of it by jettisoning it out of the hatch. Unfortunately, Captain Kirk saw him do it, and now Spock is facing a charge of making an obscene clone fall.
*****
The new ensign reported to sickbay for her physical. When stripped, Dr. McCoy nodded approvingly. "You look nice and trim."
"Thanks," she answered. "I weigh one hundred pounds stripped for gym."
McCoy shook his head. "That guy has all the luck!"
*****
McCoy: "I've borrowed Mr. Scott's bagpipes."
Kirk: "But you can't play them."
McCoy: "While I've got them, neither can he!"
*****
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: James T. Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
A: Mr. Scott: 'Cos ma wee transporter beam was na functioning properly. Ah canna work miracles, Captain.
A: Dr. McCoy: Dammit Jim!! I'm a doctor not an farmer!
A: Mr. Spock: Obviously, it was the logical thing to do.
A: Mr. Data: Why is a barn yard fowl crossing a thoroughfare humorous?
A: Mr. Worf: For the honor of all chickens.
A: Counselor Troi: I knew it was going to happen. I could sense it.
A: Computer: Insufficient information.
*****
How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
Three: a left ear, a right ear, and a final front ear.
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