Is it just bass-ackwards that I love a good math joke, but still avoid balancing my checkbook like the plague? Not really; what fun is it to balance a checkbook? That’s almost like working your way toward bad news. No, that’s exactly what it is. Some things I’d just rather not know. It’s the same with taxes. I could do it myself, but I’d end up angry, frustrated, and tired, which just isn’t worth it. But a good math joke, or better yet, a math pun, can make me smile all day long. I don't know if these will do that much for you, but a smile for a minute is still worth a read.



Perelman's Proof of the Poincare Conjecture

Professor Steve Sawin of Fairfield University. He’s got the lyrics at his website.

Alexis Lemaire broke his own record for mental computing at the Science Museum in London by finding the 13th root of a 200-digit random number in 70.2 seconds. (via J-Walk Blog)

What’s your favorite number?

The World’s Hardest Easy Geometry Problem. I’m not about to even start on this.

Waclaw Sierpinski was the mathematician who first described the math fractal that became known as the Sierpiński carpet. Andrew Pike has created a tile mosaic portrait of Sierpinski using Sierpinski carpets! (via Dump Trumpet)

DOG AND COW

A mathematican walks into a bar accompanied by a dog and a cow. The bartender says, "Hey, no animals are allowed in here."

The mathematician replies, "These are very special animals."

"How so?"

"They're knot theorists."

The bartender raises his eyebrows and says, "I've met a number of knot theorists who I thought were animals, but never an animal that was a knot theorist."

"Well, I'll prove it to you. Ask them them anything you like."

So the bartender asks the dog, "Name a knot invariant."

"Arf, arf" barks the dog.

The bartender scowls and turns to the cow asking, "Name a topological invariant."

"Mu, mu," says the cow.

At this point the bartender turns to the mathematican and says, "Very funny." With that, he throws the three out of the bar.

Outside, sitting on the curb, the dog turns to the mathematican and asks, "Do you think I should have said the Jones polynomial instead?"

TEACHER

(via Bits and Pieces)
Teacher: If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?

Vincent: One dollar.

Teacher (sadly): You don’t know your arithmetic.

Vincent (sadly): You don’t know my father.

JOB INTERVIEW

A mathematician is interviewing for a prestigious job. To make sure he has the right morals, the interviewer gives him the following situation: "You're late for a meeting, when you come across a burning house, a fire hydrant, and a fire hose lying across the street. What do you do?"

The mathematician responds: "People's lives are more important than the meeting. I screw the fire hose into the hydrant and put out the fire before coming to the office."

The interviewer is impressed, but asks him a followup question just to make sure: "You're late for a meeting when you pass a fire hose connected to a hydrant, next to a perfectly safe house. What do you do?"

The mathematician thinks for a moment, then replies: "I unscrew the fire hose, carry it across the street, and set the house on fire. Then I've reduced it to a problem I've already solved."

New Math -Tom Lehrer

Previously at Miss Cellania: Math, Math Gone Weird, Math Lessons, Math Teacher. Mathematicians, and Mathematics.

Thought for today: He wears glasses during math because it improves  division.

humor jokes video funny games math mathematics numbers arithmetic ciphering