Elephant Tales
Friday, 07.06.07 @ 12:04AM 
Elephants are a way of life in my house. Gothgrrl fell for elephants the first time she saw Dumbo. When she found out they were symbolic of her native India, it only reinforced her interest. Now she has dozens of stuffed elephants, dozens of tiny elephant knicknacks, elephant jewelry, and elephant art on her walls, including some she painted herself, tapestries, adn depictions of Ganesh. No matter what store we walk into, she seems to have a radar that detects elephants for sale. And no fair or circus comes to town without Gothgrrl buying an elephant ride. And you know what? They smell bad up close. Especially after giving rides to kids all day at the fair. But they still make me smile.
Trunk show: elephant fashions.
Elephants helped to clean up the New Orleans Zoo after Katrina.
LOLephant, from Archie’s Archive.
Elephant insemination. Not a job I’d want to try.
A baby elephant is born, on camera.
Megaphant, the superhero elephant!
Best Business name ever: Mammoth Erections. (via Neatorama)
Baby Elephant Playing the Harmonica
PAYBACK
(via Wulfweard)
An elephant is drinking out of a river when he spots a turtle asleep on a log. The elephant ambles over and kicks the unsuspecting turtle clear across the river.
"Why did you do that?" asks a passing giraffe.
"Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 47 years ago."
"Wow, what a memory!" says the giraffe.
"Yes," says the elephant. "I have Turtle recall."
ELEPHANT SPORTS
(click to enlarge)
The Elephant and the Mouse
An elephant and a mouse are walking together through the jungle when the elephant falls into a very large hole. The hole is so large that try as he might, the elephant is unable to climb out.
So the mouse says, "Hang around, I'll get something to drag you out with" and leaves. A little while later the mouse returns driving a Porsche and with a rope tied to the bumper bar and he drags the elephant out of the hole.
The two friends continue their stroll through the jungle when all of a sudden, the mouse falls into a hole. The elephant immediately stands over the hole and squatting over it, lowers his penis so the mouse can grab it and lift himself out of the hole.
The moral of this story is that "IF YOUR DICK IS LONG ENOUGH YOU DON'T NEED A PORSCHE."
Previously on Miss Cellania: Elephants and Elephant Appreciation Day
Thought for today: I meant what I said and I said what I meant - An elephant's faithful, one hundred percent! -Dr. Seuss
humor jokes video funny games elephant pachyderm
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Reader Comments (6)
My bestest friend, Tami, LOVES elephants. I recently bought her a picture book of elephants. The photography was stunning in this book.
I'm glad your daughter likes them so much. If you're ever in doubt about getting her a present she'll love, just buy her another elephant for her collection.
We are anxiously awaiting the new Harry Potter book!!!!
My son will most likely read it nonstop like he did the last one.
The kid did not sleep until he had read that whole book.
I'm not THAT dedicated, but I will certainly read it right away.
I'm anxious to find out what happens.
As usual, you have some great stuff - thanks for sharing!
I will refrain from making a Seussian poem ending in the phrases "junk" and "trunk" lol
Glad you're back!