Insects and Bugs
Friday, 07.27.07 @ 12:09AM 
Every summer, I have to deal with vermin. Ants come in every year, and I know exactly how to deal with them. Fruit flies, too. But this year, for the first time, I had a flea infestation. See, there are mice in the basement. The neighborhood cats come in after the mice. My kids thought it would be nice for our cats to take them out for walks, which brought the fleas inside. I was the last to know, since the cats sleep with the kids. Its taken three rounds of treatments, each more expensive than the last, to get rid of them. Take my advice- if you ever have fleas, start with the most expensive treatment you can get. Ask a veterinarian. We used a combination of pills for the cats, drops for the cats’ skin, and fog bombs for all nine rooms. Knock on wood, it seems to have worked this time. I hate fleas.
Flies
Mamacita is going low-tech to battle flies. The Nag on the Lake is very attractive to mosquitos.
The Color and Design Blog listed 18 beautiful butterflies with their color palettes
to show how well nature mixes colors. Any of these combinations would make a pleasant decor for a room or a website. (via Dump Trumpet)
Hero spiders alerted a family to a house fire!
Antbuster. Use your cannon to stop the ants from stealing the cake! (via Metafilter)
A definition from Hoss: My favorite word today is caterpallor. N., Crayola's finest. Def.: The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
Macrophotography. Get up close and personal with insects. (via Dump Trumpet)
Three words you don’t want to hear together: Insecticide resistant lice. (via Scribal Terror)
Chowing down on Deep-Fried Spiders. (via Grow-A-Brain)
LOLbees. (Thanks, Jessica!)
The Schmidt Sting Pain Index. You may start smarting just reading this. Boing Boing)
If you give them the right materials to work with, you can get insects to create art for you! (via Neatorama)
32 Edible Insect Foods You Can Buy Online. (via Grow-A-Brain)
The Grossest Bug Scenes in Movie History. (via Gorilla Mask)
Thailand’s Amazing Insects. (via Dump Trumpet)
SAMURAI TRYOUTS
There once was a powerful Japanese emperor who needed a new chief samurai. So he sent out a declaration throughout the entire known world that he was searching for a chief.
A year passed, and only three people applied for the very demanding position: a Japanese samurai, a Chinese samurai, and a Jewish samurai.
The emperor asked the Japanese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be the chief samurai. The Japanese samurai opened a matchbox, and out popped a bumblebee. Whoosh! went his sword. The bumblebee dropped dead, chopped in half.
The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive!"
The emperor then issued the same challenge to the Chinese samurai, to come in and demonstrate why he should be chosen. The Chinese samurai also opened a matchbox and out buzzed a fly. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, whoosh! The fly dropped dead, chopped into four small pieces.
The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive!"
Now the emperor turned to the Jewish samurai, and asked him to demonstrate why he should be the chief samurai. The Jewish Samurai opened a matchbox, and out flew a gnat. His flashing sword went Whoosh! But the gnat was still alive and flying around.
The emperor, obviously disappointed, said, "Very ambitious, but why is that gnat not dead?"
The Jewish Samurai just smiled and said, "Circumcision is not meant to kill."
THE EXTERMINATOR
A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest-control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom together, when her husband arrived home unexpectedly.
"Quick," said the woman to her lover, "into the closet!" She bundled him in the closet stark naked.
The husband, however, became suspicious and after a search of the bedroom discovered the man in the closet. "Who are you?" the husband asked the man.
"I'm an inspector from Bugs-B-Gone," said the exterminator.
"What are you doing in there?" the husband asked.
"I'm investigating a complaint about an infestation of moths," the man replied.
"And where are your clothes?" asked the husband.
The man looked down at himself and said, "Those little bastards."
Bugs and Other Creepy-Crawlies
Previously at Miss Cellania: Bugs and Insects
Thought for today: We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics. ~Bill Vaughan
humor jokes video funny games insects bugs spiders infestation exterminator
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Reader Comments (3)
Thanks for the link. :)
One of my co-workers from Mexico said "Crisco". Just pour Crisco on everyone's heads and sleep with a shower cap on. Then comb through with a Robi comb.
Bingo! It worked!
*This has been a public service announcement* /wink.