June 24 Links
Sunday, 06.24.07 @ 12:07AM 
Back from vacation, which is a story waiting to be told, and I will tell it in the next few days. For now, I’ll share just this one tidbit. Thursday was the Summer Solstice, the longest daylight of the year, and I was up early, watching the sunrise over the Atlantic. The first light became visible at 4:30AM! I’m not used to that, since I live on the western edge of the time zone, so daylight and dark are later. In fact, we never see the actual sunrise at the house because of the trees. It was awesome at the beach. BUT... Friday was the longest daylight for us, because we left the coast in the morning, where the sunrise is very early, and traveled to the western edge of the time zone, where summer daylight lasts til around 10PM. Of course, driving hundreds of miles makes the day SEEM longer, too!
Daft Hands. Stay with it, it gets better.
Washington newsmakers do ABBA in Waterloo.
Talented actor, musician, and comedian Will Smith is also good with a Rubik’s Cube!
Addictive Crossword Game.
Something is definitely wrong here. Neatorama got an NC-17 rating and YesButNoButYes got a PG. (via Simply Left Behind, which is rated G for Getouttahere!)
No one said identity thieves were brainiacs. One stole Herman Munster’s identity. (Thanks, Bill!)
The day you became a better writer.
If you start to think you have it bad, take a look at Dismal World’s Unforgettable Photos. Then count your blessings. (via Dump Trumpet)
President Bush declares himself above the law. Just like Dick Cheney.
THE PAWN SHOP
(via Big Shot Bob in Texas)
King Ozymndias of Assyria was running low on cash after years of war with the Hittites. His last great possession was the Star of the Euphrates, the most valuable diamond in the ancient world. Desperate, he went to Crosus, the pawnbroker, to get a loan.
Crosus said, "I'll give you 100,000 dinars for it."
"But I paid a million dinars for it," the king protested. "Don't you know who I am? I am the king!"
Crosus replied, "When you wish to pawn a Star, makes no difference who you are.”
Just in case you haven’t seen this... I came home and found it all over the internet. Like a virus.
See the original context here.
Would you believe celery-flavored Jello? Curry toothpaste? And what does flower-flavor taste like anyway? Mental Floss finds some disgusting flavors, and the comments add many more.
Who is this man? See if you can guess.
Elwood is a Chinese Crested and Chihuahua mix from New Jersey. He was crowned the World’s Ugliest Dog Friday at the Marin-Sonoma County Fair in California. Arbroath published a photo I was hesitant to include here for esthetic reasons.
World’s smallest Pac Man game. Shown actual size. You have to be really fast on the keys to win this one!
Yellowtail. Scribble a shape and watch it come to life! (via Say No To Crack)
THE CARETAKER’S NEWS
(via Phil’s Phun)
At dawn the telephone rings. "Hello, Senor Rod? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country house."
"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
"Um, I am just calling to tell you, Senor Rod, that your parrot died."
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
"Si, Senor, that's the one."
"Damn! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?"
"From eating rotten meat, Senor Rod."
"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
"Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?"
"The thoroughbred, Senor Rod."
"My prize thoroughbred is dead?
"Si Senor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"
"The one we used to put out the fire, Senor"
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
"The one at your house, Senor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire."
"What the hell?? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle!!??"
"For the funeral, Senor Rod."
"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL!!??"
"Your wife's, Senor Rod...She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Tiger Woods Nike Driver."
LONG SILENCE...................
"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in big trouble!"
Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenoceros -Flight of the Conchords
Thought for today: Nothing in the universe travels faster than a bounced check.
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