Miss Cellania

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Overheard

And this, fellow readers, is why Miss Cellania is probably the best writer we've ever had. A thing of beauty. -YesButNoButYes

...Miss Cellania who’s wonderfully funny and knowledgeable and also happens to write for Mental Floss. Her personal blog is updated as often as any multi-contributor blog site and has some wonderful gems... -Infinite Well

Miss Cellania has links, doctored-up photos staring Miss C. herself and YouTube videos from anywhere and everywhere on the internet. If it's funny, you'll probably see it first on her blog. -Suzanne Broughton

Miss Cellania has a site that is to die for. Whenever it’s time for a bit of a smile, interspersed with a gaffaw or two, I head on over there. -Compass Points

If you’re jonesing for more links you may want to visit Miss Cellania’s blog. Or should I say blogs. She’s like the blogosphere’s version of that Jamaican family from In Living Color. She has more blogs than they had jobs. If she starts contributing to one more blog I’m going to stage an intervention. -Cynical-C

I could never in a million years come up with half the wonderful facts, news, links et al that pepper every post she creates. -Mad Baggage

It’s a fantastic set of funny and interesting links, jokes and pictures that she compiled *every day*! -Neatorama

She finds the coolest, funniest stuff day after day. How on earth she does this I have no clue. -NYC Educator

I don't even know how I found Miss C, but I remember the first time I was there, I burned my chocolate chip cookies. I just couldn't stop browsing! Fun stuff over there. -Boomer Chick

If you're not regularly heading over and reading her well compiled, link-filled-goodness posts already, then maybe you should take a step back and do some self reflection and introspection to make sure your life is headed the direction it needs to be and that you're on a path that is fulfilling to you and your fellow man, as a person and as an American. -Hoodlumman

Funniest woman alive. -Pixie

It is quite possibly one of the most extensive sites I have seen for links to humourous content. It is a virtual encyclopedia for a myriad of different jokes on different topics and still growing. So a good site and worth checking out, theres definitely something for everyone, or anyone whos up for a laugh that is! -Mr. Joe Blog

BTW - you quite possibly put together the best, most well researched content on the web, bigtime kudos to you! -Anita B

One place I keep going back to is Miss Cellania. She really has it going on over there. Her posts are chock full of stuff I've never seen before, along with a few old favorites I had forgotten about. Anyone that can consistently come up with that much good stuff deserves kudos. -Blue Beaver Beer

Miss Cellania - is a great read, and there’s more than enough laughs to kill an evening with, on any given day. Miss C has her fingers on the pulse of every joke on the web that you haven’t seen yet. -Saskboy

(Funny, if a tad lowbrow) -Utopia Moment

Fabulous as usual..I appreciate all of the effort..and I am truly humbled. -Homo Escapeons

I'm not even sure why I thought her post is funny, but it is. That's all you're getting from me. Go read it. -konagod

YAY! Miss Cellania knows I'm alive!! -Fuzzy Dave

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« McDonalds II | Main | Engineer Identification Test »
Monday
11Jun2007

Nuns

The girls and I were having lunch at Cracker Barrel next to a table of nuns in traditional dress. Princess and Gothgrrl kept staring. “Mom, why are they dressed like that?” They’re nuns, that’s how they dress. “But why?” Um, it’s a habit.

 What’s crazy is that my kids go to parochial school. They see nuns every day! But the nuns at St. Pseudonym don’t wear habits. The kids have never seen The Trouble with Angels or The Singing Nun or even The Bells of St. Mary's, so they don’t have that stereotypical mindset about nuns. Remind me to rent Sister Act for them. 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     nb

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              The Scritch-Scratch of Busy Little Hands is a cartoon by Joy and Noelle Vaccese about how a young artist survives Catholic school. -via bovisrex

Get your own fire-breathing Nunzilla!

Se7en recalls his bad old days in parochial school.

Walker has a way with the ladies, even nuns.

Racing nuns! The expression on her face is priceless.

The 2007 Nuns Having Fun Calendar. (via All Night Surfing).

The Nuns pages.

A Nun’s Temptation.

Naughty nuns.

HOT DOG

Two Scottish nuns had just arrived to the US by boat when one said to the other, "I heard that the occupants of this country actually eat dogs."

"Odd," her companion replied, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, the mother superior pointed to a hot dog vendor and they both walked towards it.

"Two dogs, please," said one.

The vendor was only too pleased to oblige and he wrapped both hot dogs in foil. Excited, the nuns hurried over to a bench and began to unwrap their 'dogs.'

The mother superior was first to open hers, then, stared at it for a moment, leaned over to the other nun and whispered cautiously, "What part did you get?"

THE BALL GAME

Sitting behind a couple of nuns at a baseball game, whose headgear partially blocked the view, three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move. In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Utah, there are only 100 nuns living there."

The second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana, there are only 50 nuns living there."

The third guy said, "I want to go to Idaho, there are only 25 nuns living there."

One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet, calm, voice said, "Why don't you go to hell. There aren't any nuns there."

SARA PIPALINI

(Thanks, Agnel!)
Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven where they are met by St. Peter at the pearly gates.

St.Peter says "Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I'm granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want".

The first nun says, "I want to be Sophia Loren" and POOF she's gone.

The second says, "I want to be Madonna" and POOF she's gone.

The third says, "I want to be Sara Pipalini".

St. Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he says.

"Sara Pipalini" replies the nun.

St. Peter shakes his head and says, "I'm sorry, that name just doesn't ring a bell."

The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter.

He reads the paper and starts laughing. "No Sister, he laughs, this says 'Sahara Pipeline, laid by 500 men in 7 days!"

NEWS

Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, “I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent.”

"Thank God,” said an elderly nun at the back. “I’m so tired of chardonnay.”

Gasoline

(Thanks, Phil!)
A young Nun who worked for a local home health care agency was out making her rounds when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, there was a gas station just one block away. She walked to the station to borrow a can with enough gas to start the car and drive to the station for a fill up. The attendant regretfully told her that the only gas can he owned had just been loaned out, but if she would care to wait he was sure it would be back shortly. Since the Nun was on the way to see a patient, she decided not to wait and walked back to her car. 

After looking through her car for something to carry to the station to fill with gas, she spotted a bedpan she was taking to the patient. Always resourceful, she carried it to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried it back to her car. 

As she was pouring the gas into the tank of her car, two men watched her from across the street. One of them turned to the other and said: "I know that it is said that Jesus turned water into wine, but if that car starts, I'll go to church every Sunday for the rest of my life."

Thought for today: I wanted to be a nun. I saw nuns as superstars.... When I was growing up I went to a Catholic school, and the nuns, to me, were these superhuman, beautiful, fantastic people. -Madonna

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Reader Comments (9)

LOL Sahara pipeline !!!!!
The sisters are gonna love that one.

I love nuns, I find they are cool at least the ones I have met.

Let's see if I got a nun joke for you.......



A cabbie picks up a Nun.
She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her.
She asks him why he is staring.

He replies: "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you"

She answers, " My son, you cannot offend me When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."

"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.."

She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that:

#1, you have to be single and

#2, you must be Catholic."

The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!


"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley." The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush.

But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying. "My dear child," said the nun, why are you crying?"

"Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish.."

The nun says, "That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm
going to a Halloween party."

Have a nice day



06.11.07 @ 02:34AM | Unregistered CommenterWalker
Madonna wanted to be a nun? Wow...wonder what happened to her habit?

;-)
06.11.07 @ 05:02AM | Unregistered CommenterSkunk
That last one cracked me up. I never had experiences with nuns, since I was raised Baptist, but I could tell you some crazy stories about the Baptist leaders!
06.11.07 @ 08:36AM | Unregistered CommenterJules
I guess her car was nun the worse for the wear with the bedpan...
06.11.07 @ 10:56AM | Unregistered CommenterActor212
I love your nicknames for your kids. They're awesome.
06.11.07 @ 11:30AM | Unregistered Commentertrouble
Great post, thanks.
Here is another nun link who teaches at a school here in Newcastle.

Footballing nun nets award

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tyne/3292839.stm

06.11.07 @ 03:25PM | Unregistered CommenterILuvNUFC
OK, I read that article and finally figured out what I Luv NUFC means.
06.11.07 @ 03:35PM | Unregistered CommenterMiss Cellania
HAHA! Well done. :)
It's a mystery to most people outside of England. You would'nt believe how many times I get asked that question.
06.11.07 @ 04:30PM | Unregistered CommenterILuvNUFC
Two nuns are driving down the street. They drive through a tunnel and a vampire who had been hanging from the tunnel drops onto the hood of their car. Sister Mary, in the driver's seat, says to her companion, "Quick, Sister Margaret! Show him your cross!" So Sister Margaret leans out her window and yells, "Hey, Vampire! Get the f*ck off the car!"
06.11.07 @ 07:09PM | Unregistered Commenterthe frogster

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