The girls and I were having lunch at Cracker Barrel next to a table of nuns in traditional dress. Princess and Gothgrrl kept staring. “Mom, why are they dressed like that?” They’re nuns, that’s how they dress. “But why?” Um, it’s a habit.

 What’s crazy is that my kids go to parochial school. They see nuns every day! But the nuns at St. Pseudonym don’t wear habits. The kids have never seen The Trouble with Angels or The Singing Nun or even The Bells of St. Mary's, so they don’t have that stereotypical mindset about nuns. Remind me to rent Sister Act for them. 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     nb

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              The Scritch-Scratch of Busy Little Hands is a cartoon by Joy and Noelle Vaccese about how a young artist survives Catholic school. -via bovisrex

Get your own fire-breathing Nunzilla!

Se7en recalls his bad old days in parochial school.

Walker has a way with the ladies, even nuns.

Racing nuns! The expression on her face is priceless.

The 2007 Nuns Having Fun Calendar. (via All Night Surfing).

The Nuns pages.

A Nun’s Temptation.

Naughty nuns.

HOT DOG

Two Scottish nuns had just arrived to the US by boat when one said to the other, "I heard that the occupants of this country actually eat dogs."

"Odd," her companion replied, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, the mother superior pointed to a hot dog vendor and they both walked towards it.

"Two dogs, please," said one.

The vendor was only too pleased to oblige and he wrapped both hot dogs in foil. Excited, the nuns hurried over to a bench and began to unwrap their 'dogs.'

The mother superior was first to open hers, then, stared at it for a moment, leaned over to the other nun and whispered cautiously, "What part did you get?"

THE BALL GAME

Sitting behind a couple of nuns at a baseball game, whose headgear partially blocked the view, three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move. In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Utah, there are only 100 nuns living there."

The second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana, there are only 50 nuns living there."

The third guy said, "I want to go to Idaho, there are only 25 nuns living there."

One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet, calm, voice said, "Why don't you go to hell. There aren't any nuns there."

SARA PIPALINI

(Thanks, Agnel!)
Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven where they are met by St. Peter at the pearly gates.

St.Peter says "Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I'm granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want".

The first nun says, "I want to be Sophia Loren" and POOF she's gone.

The second says, "I want to be Madonna" and POOF she's gone.

The third says, "I want to be Sara Pipalini".

St. Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he says.

"Sara Pipalini" replies the nun.

St. Peter shakes his head and says, "I'm sorry, that name just doesn't ring a bell."

The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter.

He reads the paper and starts laughing. "No Sister, he laughs, this says 'Sahara Pipeline, laid by 500 men in 7 days!"

NEWS

Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, “I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent.”

"Thank God,” said an elderly nun at the back. “I’m so tired of chardonnay.”

Gasoline

(Thanks, Phil!)
A young Nun who worked for a local home health care agency was out making her rounds when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, there was a gas station just one block away. She walked to the station to borrow a can with enough gas to start the car and drive to the station for a fill up. The attendant regretfully told her that the only gas can he owned had just been loaned out, but if she would care to wait he was sure it would be back shortly. Since the Nun was on the way to see a patient, she decided not to wait and walked back to her car. 

After looking through her car for something to carry to the station to fill with gas, she spotted a bedpan she was taking to the patient. Always resourceful, she carried it to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried it back to her car. 

As she was pouring the gas into the tank of her car, two men watched her from across the street. One of them turned to the other and said: "I know that it is said that Jesus turned water into wine, but if that car starts, I'll go to church every Sunday for the rest of my life."

Thought for today: I wanted to be a nun. I saw nuns as superstars.... When I was growing up I went to a Catholic school, and the nuns, to me, were these superhuman, beautiful, fantastic people. -Madonna

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