Spring is here, and that means, um, well, it means a lot of things to me like mowing, gardening, yard sales, spring cleaning, flowers, etc. You’ll most likely see posts coming up on all those things. But to a fisherman, nicer weather is just another excuse to get out there and do what he wanted to do in the first place: go fishing! I never understood the lure of pitting your strength and intelligence against a slimy animal with no arms or legs. I don’t much care to eat them either. But I certainly understand the desire to sit on a dock or a bank and contemplate the beauty of nature. It beats mowing anyday!

 
Here Fishy Fishy Fishy!

Kinky Herring. (via the Presurfer)

Sometimes, the fishin’ is so good, you don’t need a rod, nor reel, nor bait... they just jump in the boat!

George Bush in Gone Fishin’.

Producing a fishing show isn’t as easy as you thought!

Not for the faint of heart: The Terrifying Toothpick Fish of the Amazon. Men may want to guard their jewels while reading this.

For the really BIG fish, you may want to try Mequinenza, Spain. These brothers caught 355 pounds, and that was only two fish!  (via Arbroath)

Would you believe a 405 pound halibut? How about a 646 pound catfish?  This whale shark is ten meters and eight tons! 

ICE FISHING

A blonde decides to go ice fishing one day. She takes her stool and her fishing pole onto the ice, and cuts a big hole. Then a voice says:

"THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE"

Perplexed, the blond moves her stool 100 feet, sits down again and goes to work cutting another hole. Again, the voice said:

"THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE"

Clearly flustered, she moves the stool to one last spot, sits down, and picks up her auger. Again, the voice boomed:

"FOR THE LAST TIME, THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE"

Finally, she can't take it. She cries out, "God, is that you?"

"NO, I'M THE OWNER OF THIS HOCKEY RINK"

Things You Should Never Say at a Strange Tackle Shop    
* "All right, whose going to be a sport and show me their favorite fishing hole?"

* "Anyone know who owns the red pick-up out front that I just hit?"    

* About the shop's merchandise: "Look at all this antique tackle."    

* "Let me tell you about a fish I once caught..."    

* "What! No high-tech lures? How can you people catch anything?"    

* "One of you has got to be named Bubba...let me guess."

* "You do take travelers checks, don't you?"    

* "Your rods look as if they were wrapped at the Lighthouse Project for the Blind."    

* About a picture hung behind the cash register: "Are those some ugly fish you caught or is that a family portrait?"    

* "I only use imported hooks."    

* "I need a new rod. Do you have anything in blue to match my reel?"    

* When a woman walks into the shop: "Want to see my lure?"    

* And never, ever say: "You call this live bait? Why, in New York we..."

FISHING TRIP

A man phones home from his office and tells his wife: "Something has just come up. I have a chance to go fishing for a week. It's the opportunity of a lifetime. We leave right away. So pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and especially my blue silk pajamas. I'll be home in an hour to pick them up."

He goes home in a hurry and grabs everything and rushes off.

A week later he returns. His wife asks, "Did you have a good trip, dear?"

He says, "Oh yes, great! But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas."

His wife smiles and says, "Oh no, I didn't. I put them in your tackle box!"

Previously on Miss Cellania: Fishing

Thought for today: Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.  ~Dave Barry

humor jokes video funny games fish fishing angling bait

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