April 28 Links
Saturday, 04.28.07 @ 12:07AM 
This past week, Princess turned ten years old. Where does the time go? This also made me realize its been almost a year since I’ve been on the air. How long before I stop calling myself a disc jockey? And it’s been six months since I’ve been out with a man. I feel like maybe I’m getting old. They say life is like toilet paper... it goes faster toward the end. Not that I’m getting near the end; I still say life begins at forty. But I say that because its getting hard to remember anything that happened before that!
ROFLMAO! (via Fuzzytopia)
Did you hear the one about the Japanese actress who bought a sheep and thought it was a poodle?
Dave Praeger of The Poop Report has a new book, Poop Culture, How America is Shaped by its Grossest National Product
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Eleven Sunburn Photos and One Piece of Art. (NSFW)
Saturday Morning Campaign 2008.
Comment thread of the week.
Can’t Sleep? Read this and you’ll lie awake at night worrying why.
Rob at Cockeyed.com made these Devo hats for a Guitar Hero party, and posted step-by-step instructions. (via Everlasting Blort)
This Russian site has eerily beautiful artwork designed from skeletal imagery. (via All Night Surfing)
The best short films I can recall from Night Flight.
ORIGINS
A 2nd grader asked her mother the age-old question, "How did I get here?"
Her mother told her, "God sent you."
"Did God send you, too?" asked the child.
"Yes, Dear," the mother replied.
"What about Grandma and Grandpa?" the child persisted.
"He sent them also" the mother said.
"Did he send their parents, too?" asked the child.
"Yes, Dear, He did," said the mother patiently.
"So you're telling me that there has been NO sex in this family for 200 years? No wonder everyone's so damn grumpy around here."
Great eBay feedback. Most folks don’t read these things, but should! (Thanks, Jan!)
Homeless. Australian documentary director Trevor Graham filmed a day in the life of a homeless person in each of six cities: Sydney, New York, Delhi, Tokyo, Jakarta, and London. The resulting stories are broken into many parts (which you can select individually). You may be surprised at the many ways people can find themselves without a home.
War is hell on the homefront, too. This music video is nothing like what you thought it would be.
Pong Gone Wrong. (Thanks, Bill!)
Best liscence plate ever.
Slideshow of celebrities who have appeared on Sesame Street.
SICK
A guy works a new job on Thursday and Friday. On Monday he calls in and says, "I can't come in today. I'm sick." He works the rest of the week, but the following Monday he calls in and says, "I can't come in today. I'm sick."
The boss asks the foreman about him, and the foreman says, "He's great. He does the work of two men. We need him." So the boss calls the guy into his office, and says, "You seem to have a problem getting to work on Mondays. You're a good worker and I'd hate to fire you. What's the problem? Anything we can help you with? Drugs? Alcohol?"
The guy says, "No, I don't drink or do drugs. But my father-in-law drinks every weekend, and then beats on my mother-in-law. So every Monday morning, I go over to make sure that she's alright. She puts her head on my shoulder and cries, one thing leads to another, and the next thing you know, I'm boinking her."
The boss says, "You boink your mother-in-law?"
The guy says, "Hey, I told you I was sick."
Thought for today: Hooters announced it's opening up its first restaurant in the Holy Land. After hearing this, Bill Clinton said, "As far as I'm concerned, Hooters is the holy land." -Conan O'Brien
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Reader Comments (6)
But the ROLFMAO and the eBay feedback! What a riot!
Checking the eBayer who left those comments...at first (starting in '01) they were the standard comments but then in May of '03 he must have taken a creative writing course--or maybe some psycho drugs! I spewed coffee two, no, three times reading the comments he left!