As with  most traditions at my house, the decorating of the Christmas tree ties in with an incentive for the kids. I want the house clean for Thanksgiving, they want to put up the tree. So the tree is the reward for a clean house before the guests arrive. This year, all I did was get the tree box out of the attic and watch. They could carry down the rest of the decorations, assemble the tree, and even string the lights. Princess remarked how small the tree is, and how big it used to be. Yes, I remember those days when all the ornaments were on the bottom two feet of the tree. Now both kids can reach the top easily. They asked if we could get a bigger tree, but I said no. In the argument about whether a real tree or artificial tree is better for the environment, I think we’ve done the earth well by using the same $20 6-foot tree for 15 years now.



How to decorate a serious Christmas tree.

How to Choose a Living Christmas Tree.

Check out this pretty octopus Christmas tree! (via Boing Boing)

Peter at Tesla Down Under built a Tesla Christmas tree! (via Dark Roasted Blend)

The World’s Most Unusual Christmas Trees.

How to cat-proof your Christmas tree with jingle bells and Easter eggs. It looks nicely festive, too!

The owner of a Christmas tree farm in east Tennessee found that someone had sawed off the tops of 28 large Christmas trees that were ready for market. The thief took about six feet of each tree, leading authorities to believe they will be sold as whole Christmas trees. The damaged Frasier firs would have been sold for $100 to $150 dollars each to organizations and businesses with high ceilings.  (via Fark)

The Legend of the Christmas Pickle. (via J-Walk Blog)

Christmas Lights and How to Fix Them. (via Consumerist)

The Christmas Ornament Wizard will calculate how many ornaments you need to decorate your tree! In case you don’t want to use the old-fashioned method: buy what you like and can afford, and make it work. (via J-Walk Blog)

Hale McKay doesn’t want to put up his Christmas lights yet, but he has the perfect song for those who do.

Homo Escapeons also has a song about the excesses of the season.

Alek O. Komarnitsky's Controllable Christmas lights for celiac disease are up and running! There are three live webcams and X10 powerline control technology system so web surfers can not only view the action, but also *control* the 17,000 lights. Heck, you can even inflate/deflate the giant Elmo, Frosty, Santa, SpongeBob SquarePants, and Homer Simpson – D’OH!

BOOBS

(Thanks, Rich!)
A young boy asks his father, "Dad, is it OK for us guys to notice all the different kind of boobs?"

Surprised, the father answers, "Well sure, son, we wouldn't be normal if we didn't. There are all kinds of breasts...and they change somewhat, depending on a woman's age.

"In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions."

"Onions, Dad?" asked the son.

"Yeah, you see them and they make you cry."

Not to be outdone, his sister asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of weenies are there?"

The mother, delighted to have equal time, answers, "Well, daughter, a man goes through three phases. In a man's twenties, a man's weenie is like an oak, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."

"A Christmas tree?" asked the daughter.

"Yes -- dried up and the balls are only there for decoration."

Hula Cats Christmas

Yeah, I know this doesn’t have much to do with Christmas trees, but I thought it was funny!

TREETOP ANGEL

Santa was very upset.  It was Christmas Eve and NOTHING was going right!

Mrs. Claus had burned all the cookies.  The elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime they had while making the toys.  The reindeer had been drinking all afternoon and were dead drunk.  To make matters worse, they had taken the sleigh out for a spin earlier in the day and had crashed it into a tree.

Santa was furious.  "I can't believe it!  I've got to deliver millions of presents all over the world in just a few hours and all of my reindeer are drunk, the elves are on strike and I don't even have a Christmas tree!"

He continued,  "And I sent that stupid Little Angel out hours ago to find a tree and he isn't even back yet!  What am I going to do?"

Just then, the Little Angel opened the front door and stepped in from the snowy night, dragging a Christmas tree behind him. He said,  "Yo, fat man!  Where do you want me to stick the tree this year?"

And thus the tradition of angels atop the Christmas tree got its start...

Previously at Miss Cellania: Christmas Decorations and The Cat's Christmas

Thought for today: Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree.  In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall.  ~Larry Wilde

humor jokes video funny games Christmas Christmas tree ornaments decorations holiday