Yes, more toilets in the continuing series, but today is a bit different. This is what they call "co-blogging", a joint venture with Alex of Neatorama (def: a big dog blog). He said it means posting the same thing on the same day and promoting each other. What it really means is that he wants to use my extensive research and I covet his traffic (w00t)! Go see his version of "the toilet post", called Toilet-O-Rama.

The Incinerating Toilet. (Thanks, Saur!)

Automated toilet cleaning.

Beware the new talking urinal! Imagine what it would say to you!

Gizmo, the obsessive toilet-flushing cat! (via Arbroath)

Fancy Hand-Painted Toilet Seats. And I do mean fancy.

The Happiest Potties on Earth. Yes, a webpage about the toilets at Disney World.

A blog on New York bathrooms. (Thanks, Saur!)

Ten Toilets You have Never Seen. I beg to differ, but that’s just me. I have been doing research.

Flushed Away is a movie that takes you down the toilet and into the sewers. Holiday fare for the kids, ya know.

Crazy Japanese toilet prank.

I posted it before, but its worth a second look for being so clever: The men's bathroom at the Sofitel hotel in Queenstown, New Zealand.

A Flickr set of strange gender signs, photographed from bathrooms all over.

The Useless Men have Useless Advice on toilet etiquette.

I got it! Lets put a video game in the urinal!

My TQ (Toilet Quotient) is 131. How much do YOU know about toilets? (Thanks, Desiree!)

PRODUCTS

The Kisses urinal and other fine fixtures from Bathrooom Mania.

The Potty Putter.

The Bumper Dumper. The ultimate outdoor accessary, when you’re on the go and have to go.

Wind Surfer toilet bowl cleaner.

Talk about different! The Rocking Horse Toilet.

Custom-printed toilet paper. 'Cause, ya know, its a captive audience.

POETRY

One of my bygone recollections, as I recall the days of yore
is the little house, behind the house, with the crescent o'er the door.
'Twas a place to sit and ponder with your head bowed down so low,
knowing that you wouldn't be there, if you didn't have to go.

Ours was a three-holer, with a size for every one.
You left there feeling better after the job was done.
You had to make these frequent trips, whether snow, rain, sleet, or fog,
to the little house where you sat and read the Sears Roebuck catalog.

Oft times in dead of winter the seat was covered with snow.
'Twas then with much reluctance to the little house you'd go.
With a swish you'd clear the seat, bend low and, with shivers in mind,
you'd blink your eyes and grit your teeth as you sat on your behind.

I recall the day that Granddad, who stayed with us one summer,
made a trip to the shanty which proved to be a hummer.
'Twas the same day my Dad finished painting the kitchen green.
He'd just cleaned up the mess he'd made with rags and gasoline.

He tossed the rags in the shanty hole and went on his usual way,
not knowing that by doing so he would eventually rue the day.
Now Granddad had an urgent call; I never will forget!
This trip he made to the little house lingers in my memory yet.

He sat down on the shanty seat, with both feet on the floor,
then filled his pipe with tobacco and struck a match on the outhouse door.
As he took a long puff on his pipe, he slowly raised his behind,
tossed the flaming match in the open hole, with not a worry on his mind.

The blast that followed, I am sure was heard for miles around;
and there was poor ol' Granddad just sitting on the ground.
The smoldering pipe was still in his mouth, his suspenders he held tight;
the celebrated three-holer was blown clear out of sight.

When we asked him what had happened, his answer I'll never forget.
He thought it must of been something he had et!
Next day we had a new one which my Dad built with ease.
With a sign on the entrance door which read: No Smoking, Please!

Now that's the end of the story, with memories of long ago,
of the little house, behind the house where we went cause we had to go.

Women, Men, Disabled, and .... Daleks?

STUCK

A young Jewish couple had only recently set up housekeeping when an unfortunate incident occurred. Early one morning, the wife, drowsy from bed, went to the toilet to pee and neglected to notice that the seat was up. When she sat, she kept going!

She was just the right size and shape so that she became jammed into the toilet past her waist with her legs sticking straight up in front of her. She cried for her husband, who rushed in, and for the next hour tried desperately to free her.

In this process, they removed her sleeping gown, but this only left her naked and still stuck, with a particular part of her anatomy prominently visible between her splayed legs. Finally, the couple resolved to call a plumber, despite the embarrassing nature of their problem.

When the plumber arrived, the young man let him in, but as they were walking to the bathroom, the young man realized that his wife was exposed in a very compromising and humiliating way. Thinking fast, he ran ahead of the plumber and placed the first thing he could think of, his yarmulke skull cap, over his wife's exposed privates.

The plumber walked into the bathroom, took one long look, and commented: "Well, I think I can save your wife, buddy, but the Rabbi's a goner."

So when you get down to it, where is the best bathroom? Carl said...

The most comfortable urinal I've ever used is in PJ Clarkes in Manhattan. A man can really rest his elbows on the sides and spend as much time as he needs draining the old reservoir. I highly recommend it, even if you have to fly in just to pee...

And finally, feast your eyes on what was rated the World’s Best Bathroom! I can’t argue with that. (via Neatorama)

Previously on Miss and Cellania: Toilet Humor and More Toilet Humor

Thought for today: The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.

PS Thanks again to (new first-time daddy) Alex of Neatorama for working with me on this co-blogging project. I had so many fun toilet links, you wouldn’t be able to “absorb” them in one sitting, so watch here for more toilet fun in the future!

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