Kentucky
Thursday, 04.20.06 @ 12:33AM 
Alex over at Neatorama wrote a piece entitled Four Neat Things about Los Angeles. Its a "meme". Then tagged me (I'm not worthy!) to write Four Neat Things about my hometown. I had to think about that. My town is SO small (chorus: how small is it?) that 1. if I wrote about it, I would lose the very last shred of anonymity I have left, and b. I can only think of two neat things about it that would interest you. So I am expanding my theme (or meme) to include all of Kentucky. After all, Alex changed the meme somewhat; I can too! And since my entire state has about half as many people as the city of Los Angeles, it doesn't seem too much like cheating. BTW, if Neatorama calls it "Neat Things about My Hometown", maybe I should call this "Miss Cellaneous Things.. "? Naw, that's just dumb. Can't have any of that here! I will include some jokes for those who would expect such.
Pictured here are Princess and Gothgrrl acting like tourists. I'm sure you can figure out which one is which from the poses.
4 Neat Things Kentucky is Famous For
1. Kentucky Fried Chicken
2. The Kentucky Derby
3. Mammoth Cave (pictured here>)
4. Fort Knox
Ten Horses Least Likely To Win the Kentucky Derby
10. Future Glue
9. Senor Sleepy
8. Parts On Order
7. Tax Write-Off
6. Two Fat Guys In a Horse Costume
5. Pothole Dancer
4. 2-Legged Pierre
3. Ebola
2. Kevorkian's Delight
1. CBS
4 Neat Kentuckians You Don't Know
1. Floyd Collins, cave exploring legend.
2. Edgar Cayce, mystical healer.
3. Randolph McCoy, the REAL McCoy.
4. Henry Earl, the Lexington town drunk.
4 Neat and Beautiful Places
1. Cumberland Falls
2. Cumberland Gap
2. Pine Mountain
4. Red River Gorge
4 Neat Pieces of Eye Candy Born in Kentucky

1. George Clooney
2. Johnny Depp
3. Ashley Judd
4. Billy Ray Cyrus

4 Neat Kentucky Sports Figures
A state which has no major professional teams in football, basketball, baseball, or hockey nevertheless has some legends. You just never think about them.
1. Muhammad Ali, former world heavyweight boxing champ, known as "The Greatest".
2. Secretariat, 1973 Triple Crown Winner.
3. UK basketball program, seven-time NCAA champions with a loyal and fanatical following.
4. Jenny Hansen, NCAA gymnast of the century.
The Math Lesson
The owner of a golf course in Kentucky was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from The University of Kentucky and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"
The secretary thought a moment, then replied, "Everything but my earrings."
You gotta love those Kentucky women.
4 Kentucky Products
Our economy is based on the premise: "We don't care what's good for you, we only care whether you want to buy it."
1. Bourbon
2. Marijuana
3. Tobacco
4. Coal
The Mirror
After living in the remote wilderness of Kentucky all his life, an old hillbilly decided it was time to visit the big city. In one of the stores he picks up a mirror and looks in it. Not knowing what it was, he remarked, "How about that! Here's a picture of my daddy."
He bought the 'picture', but on the way home he remembered his wife, Lizzy, didn't like his father. So he hung it in the barn, and every morning before leaving for the fields, he would go there and look at it.
Lizzy began to get suspicious of these many trips to the barn. One day after her husband left, she searched the barn and found the mirror. As she looked into the glass, she fumed, "So that's the ugly bitch he's runnin' around with."
Other sites responding to the tag:
Stuff on Fire did Cincinnati.
Scribal Terror also did Cincinnati.
The Presurfer did Tilburg, in the Netherlands.
Now I reckon I'm supposed to tag other folks. OK, lets keep it casual. If you are on my blogroll, you are tagged. So how easy that was? If you're not and want to participate anyway, go ahead! Let me know about it, so I can read about your hometown.
Thought for today: Kentucky, five million people, fifteen last names.




















Reader Comments (22)
2. Interestin' Kentucky factoid ;-) I'd do up one for Colorado, but I'm not a native; so I'd have to do mine on Iowa. And you can get non-prescription sleep aids at the drug store, which are easier than reading my blog...
'Skunk'
Stinkbug (according to me).
I'm shocked, SHOCKED, I say, to find that Kentucky Woman isn't the state song and that Kentucky Bourbon didn't make your list!
Beautiful places there too.
I have to book trip there... now!
You make Kentucky sound appealing for reasons besides the fact that it contains you!
Alex, thanks!
Skunk, I've never found anything you've written to be boring.
Hoss, I would suggest gnats. They are everywhere! The stink comes from elsewhere.
Carl, Bourbon is right there in the KY Products list. And Kentucky Woman SHOULD be the state song!
Heather, Karen, and BJ, I concur. I had a list of two, but its supposed to be four, so I added Ashley for the guys, and Billy Ray is NOT ugly. Not in George or Johnny's league, but he's OK.
RockyJay, come on up! You'd have a great time.
Joel. i reallu enjoyed your post.
Ed, its downpouring here, but that's typical. Its monsoon season. Storms don't bother me, its just more work when I'm on the air.
Maybe so, although I inexplicably think of Elvis' "Cold Kentucky Rain."
Joel, me too! But the Neil Diamond song is less depressing.
Nancy, you betcha! The interesting list folks are all dead, except Henry, who is in jail. The eye candy folks are all alive and WELL.
Mary, I didn't include Tom Cruise because he wasn't born in KY, although he did go to high school here. And because he's a nutjob. I'm sorry you are stuck in Inidiana!
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I thought she was going to find that he was cheating with her sister.