When you get to the last joke in this post, try to take note of how many of the one-liners you understand. Then let me know in the comments. Of course, understanding them and finding them funny are two different things! If, in fact, you find them funny without understanding them, then I think I may have a bridge you might be interested in buying. But thats for another place and time. Right now, its time for some fun with science!

50 interesting science facts.

Science toys you can make at home with your kids. (via the Presurfer)

Ten Scientific Frauds that rocked the world.

How MIT professors use computers to illustrate their sketches.

Accordion Guy has a periodic table using the first image found by Google for the name of the element. (via Neatorama)

Try some fun experiements at Hunkin’s Experiments. Just reading them is fun! (via Ursi’s blog)

You have probably seen The History of the Universe in 200 Words or Less, since I’ve posted it before and its been around for about ten years. But did you know about the many translations? Its been converted into many different languages, including many of what they call Psuedo-translations. I particularly like the Klingon version and the Beavis and Butthead version, but thats mainly because I have yet to grow up. (Thanks, Bill!)

Eric Idle explains the cosmos in The Galaxy Song.

How videogames teach physics.

The Physics of Something Awful. What can happen to bodies due to the force of gravity, centrifical force, inertia, etc etc , anyway, there are some awful things that can happen. The kinds of things you would expect from the guys at Something Awful. (via Cynical-C)

A galaxy is a big thing. A cluster of galaxies is a bigger thing. I don’t know how they take photos of such things, but when you explore them with photography, x-rays, and radio waves, you can see what binds those huge galaxies into a unit. And they are beautiful photos, too.

If you don’t think science is sexy, take a look at this Craiglist ad featured at Mental Floss!

Who Wants to Be a Cognitive Neuroscientist Millionaire? is a fascinating article about a true egghead (Ogi Ogas) who had a system for winning on a game show. Who could resist such prose as:
My neurohormones whipped from black misery to shining ebullience, saturating my brain in a boiling cauldron of epinephrine and endorphins. I gaped at the azure screen in front of me as the ultimate question coalesced in hot white font.
Did he win a million? I’m not giving away the end of the story!

From the Book of Weird Experiments, read many tales of strangeness, including the Living Dog’s Head. (not for the squeamish) Film available at the site. (via Everlasting Blort)

Playing with water in outer space. This is way cool to look at!

SPACE MONKEYS

NASA decided to send a shuttle into space with two monkeys and an astronaut.

They trained them for months. Then when they thought they were all ready, they placed all three in the shuttle and got ready to send them up into space.

As the moment came closer, NASA's mission control center announced, ''This is mission control to Monkey One. Do your stuff.'' At that the first monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle's engines ignited and the shuttle took off.

Two hours later NASA's mission control center announced, ''This is mission control to Monkey Two. Do your stuff.'' At that the second monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle separated from the empty fuel tanks.

Another two hours later NASA's mission control center announced, ''This is mission control to the astronaut...'

At this the astronaut shouted ''I know, I know. Feed the monkeys and don't touch anything.''

A Whole Bunch of Scientists walk into a bar...

Rene Descartes was sitting at a bar.  The bartender came over and asked if he would like another drink.  He replied, "I think not."  And he vanished.

Heisenburg was also sitting at the bar.  After Descartes vanished in a puff
of smoke, the bartender walked over to him and asked, "Did you see that?"

To which Heisenberg replied, "I can't be certain."

The bartender then noticed Einstein was there.  So he asked him if he could believe what had happened.  Einstein replied, "It's all relative."

Then the bartender noticed that Carl Sagan was there.  He walked over to him and asked, "Can you believe that all these famous people are here in THIS bar?"  

Sagan replied, "No.  Why, there must be BILLIONS and BILLIONS of bars out there."

Meanwhile, Gustav Hertz was having such a great time, that he promised to return in the future at a much greater frequency.

Robert Boyle commented that he thought everyone was under too much pressure to come up with an answer to what was happening.

Erwin Schroedinger tried to explain that in the absence of an observer, Decartes left but at the same time did not leave.

But Alexander Volta disagreed stating there was a potential difference between his staying or going.

James Watt had had a bad day and said he had come in just to let off a little steam.

Charles Darwin refused to take a stand on the days events as he was waiting to see what would evolve.

Thomas Edison stated that he found the whole thing illuminating.

Andre Ampere helped the bartender ascertain that all the statements were kept current.

Eli Whitney said, "I believe I will have another gin."

Sir Isaac Newton pondered the gravity of the situation.

Robert Goddard said the situation was not rocket science.

Archimedes didn't participate.  He was out having a screw.

Georg Ohm, though he resisted answering, did provide a tasty treat for the crowd. Everyone loved Ohm's slaw.

Max Karl Ernst Ludwig Planck thought it a constant drain of energy to contemplate the disappearance.

Gaston Plante thought Descartes should be put in a cell for battery.

William Sturgeon and Joseph Henry made a good gauss at where Descartes had gone.

Johann Salomo, Christoph Schweigger, and Jacques Arsene d'Arsonval were galvanized into instant action.

Both Mr. and Mrs. Curie thought that Descartes had a radiating personality, even after his disappearance.

Nicola Tesla re-coiled at the sight.

Previously on Miss Cellania: Science Class, The Laboratory, and Advanced Science Class.

Thought for today: Resistance is futile (if < 1 ohm).

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