Candy companies are excited about Halloween, as always. They’ve managed to turn most holidays into candy orgies, but Halloween is still, tops! But every year, it seems that candy manufacurers go out of their way to made candy as gross and disgusting as they possibly can. See the face here? Its made of chocolate. Chocolate body parts, from my niece's birthday party. I found two foil-covered eyeballs, and felt compelled to take a photo. The family then found me an ear and mouth to go with them. Its a work of art, or something.

This year’s crop of strange Halloween candy.

i-Mockery’s Ultimate Guide to Halloween Candies of 2006! Don't forget Part Two.

Candy Addict thinks you should not only GET candy, but also BE candy this Halloween!

Stupid stuff you can eat presents Sour Flush Candy.

Ear Wax candy. Nuff said.

Bad Candy, however, is the ultimate bad candy website.

Halloween sucks!

M&Ms dark Chocolate has a game called Dark Just Got Fun where you find the “dark” movie titles in this painting. There are 50, but you can save and return to the game if you like.

Hershey’s TrickOrTreats has a list of sweet treat recipes.

i-Mockery has a wonderful list of candy alternatives you could dispense on Halloween.

TRUE STORY

Last Halloween, my wife was handling candy duty when a  trio of children, costumed as a witch, a pumpkin, and a princess,  arrived at the door.  She had spent some time arranging the lollipops,  candy bars and other sweets in a metal bowl and was quite proud of the  results.  The three children said "Trick of Treat!", and as she presented  the bowl, they were clearly impressed.

"Whooooaaaaa!", they marveled in unison.

My wife beamed, offering each child two pieces of candy.  As the  children were walking away from the door, my wife overheard one of them saying, "See, they really go for that "Whoa" thing!"

Lewis Black on Candy Corn

The Rules of Chocolate

1. If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

2. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

3. The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

4. Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.

5. If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

6. If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?

7. Money talks. Chocolate sings.

8. Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

9. Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
A. Because no one wants to quit.

10. Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

11. A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?

12. If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?

Candy Corn

Previously on Miss Cellania: Trick or Treat

Thought for today: After eating chocolate you feel godlike, as though you can conquer enemies, lead armies, entice lovers.  ~Emily Luchetti

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