Today, I am proud to be co-blogging (and subsequently, “doing lunch”) with Hanan Levin of Grow-a-Brain. He came up with quite a few of these lunch links, and is also using some of mine on his Lunch post today at his site. Thanks, Hanan, for an enjoyable project! Y’all go over there and leave a comment! Now, let’s do lunch.

Here at Miss Cellania, the goal is to NOT be boring. Its a difficult goal. But some folks don’t even try. (via File It Under) In a related story, this guy took a photograph of every meal he ate in 2005. (via Arbroath)

When you’re cooking in your workshop, its essential to have the proper tools. Click the picture to start the video.

Have you ever seen a pecan pie this big? Can you imagine how many calories are in there? Recipe and instructions included.

Blog of the Day: Cheap Eats, where you get real-world advice on affordable food.

The Fast Food Song (via Neatorama)

Should this page be called Woodlice Recipes or Woodlouse Recipes? They don’t seem to know themselves. One thing I knwo for sure, I’m NOT gonna eat any of this! (Thanks, Bill!)

Game: The Attack of the Sprouts. Posted before, but worth another look just for the laughs.

Extreme Drive-Through at McDonalds,  PLUS the world’s dumbest McDonald’s customers.

How to make diet-portioned food. Shown to the right.>

At the other extreme, 3 Guys from Miami tell us how to make an authentic Cuban sandwich, with about a half pound of meat in each. Reading this made me hungry!

The Useless Men have some advice on barbecuing. Not good advice, no I didn’t say that!

Ten Drinks You Should never have to Endure.

Dirty Secrets of the Food-Processing Industry. When I saw this, I expected something that would make me sick, but NO, there are no pictures, and no exposes on filthy conditions. This is a straightforward look at how modern processing destroys nutrition. reading it will not disgust you, but may educate you. (via the Presurfer)

The Onion Face Paint Project, a Flickr gallery of photos of onions with faces painted on them.

If you are a regular here, you know I’ve been following the goings-on at McMurdo Station in Antarctica, courtesy of Phil Jacobsen. Its apparent that no one has their own kitchen, but everyone has a video camera.

ICE CREAM

(lifted from Hoss)
This guy goes into an ice cream shop and asks for a sundae with extra hot fudge.

Waitress: "Hot fudge only comes in one temperature."

 How to have lunch, courtesy of Pee Wee Herman.

SEX

A little girl runs out to the yard where her father is working, and asks him, "Daddy, what's sex?"
Her startled father sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse, sperms and eggs.

He goes on to tell her about puberty, menstruation, erections, wet-dreams... and, he thinks -- what the hell -- and goes on to tell her the works. He covers a wide assortment of topics and by the time he's finished, his daughter is somewhat awestruck with this sudden influx of bizarre new knowledge.

Her father finally asks: "So what did you want to know about sex for?"

"Oh, mommy said to tell you lunch would be ready in a couple of secs..."

RABBI MOISHE

Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to convert or leave Italy.

There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal. He would have a religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community. If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy, if the Pope won, they would have to convert or leave.

The Jewish people met & picked an aged but wise Rabbi Moishe to represent them in the debate. However, as Moishe spoke no Italian & the Pope spoke no Yiddish, they all agreed that it would be a "silent" debate.

On the chosen day, the Pope & Rabbi Moishe sat opposite each other for a full minute before the Pope raised his hand & showed three fingers.

Rabbi Moishe looked back & raised one finger.

Next, the Pope waved his finger around his head. Rabbi Moishe pointed to the ground where he sat.

The Pope then brought out a communion wafer & a chalice of wine. Rabbi Moishe pulled out an apple.

With that, the Pope stood up & declared that he was beaten, that Rabbi Moishe was too clever, & that the Jews could stay.

Later, the Cardinals met with the Pope, asking what had happened. The Pope said, "First, I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there is still only one God common to both our beliefs. Then, I waved my finger to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine & wafer to show that God absolves us of all our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of original sin. He had me beaten & I couldn't continue."

Meanwhile the Jewish community gathered around Rabbi Moishe. "How did you win the debate?" they asked.

"I haven't a clue," said Moishe. "First he said to me that we had three days to get out of Italy, so I gave him the finger. Then he tells me that the whole country would be cleared of Jews & I said to him, we're staying right here."

"And then what?" asked a woman.

"Who knows?" said Moishe, "He took out his lunch, so I took out mine."

Previously on Miss Cellania: Breakfast 

Thought for today: The three-martini lunch is the epitome of American efficiency. Where else can you get an earful, a bellyful and a snootful at the same time?   -Gerald R. Ford

Now go check out the other version of Lunch at Grow-a-Brain. If you don't see anything different from this one, he's got plenty of other posts you'll enjoy.

humor jokes video funny games lunch meal midday noon